Retirement. We work toward this our whole lives, but when the time comes, retirement can be a scary affair.
If you are not working, are you useless? Who will miss you? How are you going to stay connected with the rest of humanity? Will you be left behind?
Before the advance of the welfare state with pensions and improving life expectancy through affordable modern medicine, retirement was the privilege of the rich and those lucky enough to still be alive at retirement age.
For quite some time, people retired at 65, and many died at the age of 70. ‘Retirement’ meant something else entirely. It was much more frightening to those on the approach.
But all that has changed now. Life after working age is, for most of us, a new and potentially very fulfilling, even exciting phase of life with unprecedented freedom and personal choice.
Explore your unfulfilled dreams – with a lot less pressure
Perhaps you have put your dreams aside for a stable job you didn’t enjoy as much? Now is the time to explore those dreams! Creative writing, painting, making movies, singing, playing in an orchestra – all of these activities are open to you now.
Do not be intimidated by the conventional idea that you must be young to practice an art form. Many of the creative arts, such as writing books and playing music, are age neutral and are become more so as societal prejudices adapt to active retirement. There are even professional ballet dance performances by all-senior troupes!
Continue with a profession you love – at your own pace
Many people now ‘stagger’ their retirement.
The old system, 40 hours a week until the day you retire, is giving way to a slower and more productive transition. If you love your profession, you may be able to continue part time or work as a consultant. This will also ensure that you keep your social work contacts active.
Volunteer, and volunteer abroad
Retirement has traditionally been a time to travel. It is great fun to see the world, to choose the climate you prefer. But now there is another, even more fulfilling option: volunteer your skills! Learn new ones!
45% of healthy retirees in the US volunteer, a much higher figure than that of those still at work.
And why not see the world while you are volunteering? Many overseas organizations are actively recruiting retired experts all around the globe.
Volunteering allows you to make an extremely useful and much-needed contribution, without the long-term commitment.
Family
Retirement affords you the opportunity to spend more time with your family, especially with grandchildren(if you have any). A great opportunity to engage with the future! But be careful – younger people know even less about retirement than you do, and their expectations of how you should feel and behave may not always be helpful.
Love and retirement
The fear of a ‘useless’ old age extends to love, intimacy and relationships.
Maybe, somewhere in our heads, we still have the image of grandfathers who are ‘past it’ and old ladies who have long given up on romance.
But right now, there is a real boom in ‘senior dating’. Divorce rates in retirement are also up, perhaps indicating that older people have in fact not given up on finding a more fulfilling relationship and feeling the freedom to finally pursue love.
If you are fortunate to be with the partner you love, you now have much more time for each other again, maybe more than ever. You will now be able to enjoy many more adventures and pleasures together, and reshape whatever is less than perfect.
To touch on one of the biggest fears of retirement, according to a 2011 US survey, 54% of sexually active seniors between 75 and 85 were intimate with a partner at least twice every month. Some retirement homes have become dating hubs.
A new word for retirement
In her book ‘It’s your time’, Donna McCaw suggests that we might need to find a new word for retirement altogether.
With retirement now lasting up to four decades, and with more and more of that time spent in reasonably good health, you have up to 40% of your life ahead of you. This is the time to create meaning for yourself and others!
For further information, please take a look at my specialty page on individual counseling.
