Trust matters.

Of course! You won’t get any arguments from anybody on that.

But why exactly does it matter so much? Especially in intimate relationships?

Trust – The Binding Power in Relationships

Love is the foundation of a healthy relationship. Commitment, respect, loyalty, kindness, patience, empathy, and communication are some of the building blocks.

Trust is like the cement that holds it all together.

Trust binds and solidifies your relationship. It provides you with a feeling of security. Through the stability and strength it lends, it builds the bond between you and your mate. Trusting that your partner’s true intentions are good, and loving affects all aspects of your marriage positively.

In fact, a healthy relationship encompasses several types of trust:

  • Trust that you love each other for who you are. No ulterior motives!
  • Trust that you will remain faithful to each other—sexually and emotionally.
  • Trust that you will give each other freedom and avoid controlling one another.
  • Trust that you will not harm each other—physically or verbally.
  • Trust that you will not reject or abandon one another when faced with disagreements and negative feelings. Never threatening with divorce!
  • Trust that you will prioritize your marriage and avoid taking each other for granted or neglecting your union.

Amazingly, instead of making you feel imprisoned, real trust gives you the freedom of experiencing the full potential of your marriage. It allows you to be completely vulnerable with your partner. Trust matters because it gives you the freedom to share who you really are deeply and exclusively.

That happens because the trust between you assures that whatever you share will be cherished and valued. And no matter what you reveal—good, bad, or ugly—you are certain that they love you.

Trust is something you should value, enjoy, and protect. How?

How to Protect Your Trust in Practical Ways

Work as a team

Marriage isn’t a one-man-show; it’s a team effort. Some stretches of time will be rockier than others—there’s no way around the ups and downs. However, in order to navigate that difficult terrain, you must work together and watch out for each other.

When there are relationship issues, put yourself in your spouse’s shoes. Try to understand where they’re coming from. Empathize with your partner and ask yourself if their needs are met. Tackle problems as a unit, finding solutions together and compromising. Teamwork builds trust.

Be honest with yourself and your spouse

Secrets can destroy a marriage very quickly. Of course, nobody is perfect—you’ll both mess up occasionally. But don’t let yourself get caught getting in “too deep” just because you fear talking about a problem. When protecting your trust, matters always need to be kept open and honest.

One great way to accomplish that is to remember that all secrets eventually come to light. So, stop wasting your energy struggling to keep them. If you’re seeing yourself heading in a bad direction, don’t undermine your trust because of shame. Rather, honestly acknowledge your problem to yourself and your spouse. It allows them to help you and then join you in your triumph.

Another way to achieve openness is showing yourself accountable. Be completely transparent—having access to each other’s confidential information, such as financial documents, phone records, or email and social media accounts. No need for spying, but simply create accountability.

Continually communicate

Team members always communicate, otherwise, the team would fail. People who want to keep things open and honest, communicate effectively Yes, communication is a crucial factor in protecting trust. When it stops, trust begins corroding.

Of course, the best kind of communication is face-to-face. Make it direct and personal, yet respectful and compassionate. When you promote that kind of conversational atmosphere, you’re never afraid to speak the truth. And that intimacy keeps your trust strong.

Keep growing… together

That means, not just growing closer but also moving forward together, learning more and more about each other. When your marriage becomes stagnant—just like a pool of water—an unhealthy environment develops that can quickly create mistrust.

So, put some effort into doing things together and creating memories. Be imaginative; be spontaneous. Go outside your comfort zone! Engage in activities that inspire you, help you know each other deeply, and make your love and trust grow for each other.

Never forget that it’s much easier to protect and preserve your trust than trying to rebuild it when it is broken. Thus, it’s imperative that you keep the trust “glue” intact and prevent the marital structure from tumbling down. You don’t want to be buried beneath a pile of rubble. Reach out to a couples counselor if you find trust is wavering and your marriage is a bit wobbly.  Trust matters and protecting it is worth the work!

To learn more about couples therapy click here.